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Sunday, January 26th, 2003

(3 born to suck | a sucker is born every minute)

Subject:SHIT ADDS UP AT THE BOTTOM
Time:8:35 pm.
Mood:prying open my third eye.
I was looking for tool pics when I found this one. It is at the cochella art fest in 1999 and I was there. It was such a good show. Its only second to the Tool show on oct 31 2001, but i cant seem to find any pics of that one. They played with rage against the machine and to see Maynard sing with rage was so fucking amazing. Enjoy and be jelous.



Saturday, January 18th, 2003

(9 born to suck | a sucker is born every minute)

Subject:IM SUCH A SLOUCH
Time:8:57 pm.
I have come to a point of realization in my life. I took a good look back at my life from the time I turned 18 and all have done is wasted 5 years. All I have to show for it is a ex-drug addicition, a bitch of a ex-girlfriend who stole all my shit and no advancement in in my education. But on the plus side I have alot of life lessons, a mountian of wisedom, and a better grasp of wht the real world is like. I feel like I have aged 20 years in the past 5. The only truely great thing i have in my life is Lori. She inspries me to become so much more.

I guess what got me thinking about this is the ammount of time i need to spend in school. I have 2-3 untill I have my vet tech license and another 6-7 untill i am a vet. so that comes out to at least 8 years of school before i get to where i want to be. I will be 31 or 32. I should have started sooner. Another problem is all the schools are at least 30 miles away. The closest is Cal poly Pomona and from what i have gathered by talking to other vets is it will cost me about 80,000 bucks and that will take at least 10 years to pay off. Ill be 40 before everything is said and done
I really nee to get my ass in gear.

Friday, January 17th, 2003

(a sucker is born every minute)

Subject:ITS NOT MY PROBLEM
Time:11:55 pm.
I was sitting around thinking (or drinking) the two seem to go hand and hand. So today I was thinking about how many people I have seen die first hand and how apathetic i feel about witnessing these events.

The first was when I was 16. I was siting in my friends garage in Long Beach. We were drinking and smoking cheap pot like all poor high school students do. And some Black guy was walking down the other side of the street. Nothin to pay attention to but a car pulls up next to him. Some big blue 70's Monte Carlo with tinted windows. All I rember seeing was the barrel of a shotgun point out the window, a bang, and a red cloud come out of this mans chest. All I did was close the door and continue with my pot smoking.

The second incident was whem I was 18. Again in long beach. My friend and I were getting gas at about 2 in the morning. So we were fueling up when some gansta asshole walks into the gas station we were just in and pulls a gun on the poor smuck that was working that night I hear some yelling and my buddy tells me to get in the car. After a very short argument about how much gas he got as opposed to how much he paid for i jump in his car. Right as I look back i see is blood spray all over the window and the poor clerk fall like a sack of potatos. The last thing I see is the the cholo run out with is a few packs of smokes.

The third time was in front of my apt. in whittier ca. I saw some douch running from the cops on a motorcycle early in the morning while I was on my way back from getting a pack of smokes. As I was finishing my smoke on the stoop of my building I saw the bike hauling as up the street. Right as it passed my building it clipped the back of a work truck. The rider went one way and the bike went the other. The rider hit the curb on the oppiset side of the street and I watched his neck twist like a licorice stick. His bike pin-wheeled down the street about 4 feet of the groung for 100 or so more feet and proceded to explode into quite an inpressive fireball. About 10 min. later I was asleep without a care in the world even after I watched a river of another mans blood wash up to my feet.

In all Truth I Am glad these people died. They were probably stupid or at least they dersevered it. Darwin was right

Sunday, January 5th, 2003

(a sucker is born every minute)

Subject:Damn dirty liars
Time:6:34 pm.
Last night was pretty good. I went out with my friends who I never see anymore. I had a pretty good time. I got a bit too drunk though. I had to be in at work at 6:30 this morning and I only got 4 or 5 hours of sleep for the 4th night in a row so Im beyond burned out now. Anayway I sat around drank ALOT of beer and whiskey and watched about 10 episodes of Family guy. God damn I miss that show. I gotta go to fox and kick some ass to get it back on the air. Besides just sitting around and watching T.V. I got the new Mudvayne cd. To anyone who says that cd sucked, SCREW YOU.
Just because its not a carbon copy of their first album, or second shall I say it dosent make it bad. Its much more melodic than the first album and I think its just as good. Any band that can write a song in an 11/8 time signature has my upmost respect. Just from listening to it once I could tell the gituarist got a lot better. You can definatlly teel they have been inspird by Tool and Pantera. Its so sick. If you like good heavy musig to bash peoples skulls by, pick it up. Shit I just found out my baby istn feeling good.

Saturday, January 4th, 2003

(1 born to suck | a sucker is born every minute)

Time:1:13 am.
If I soak my hands in others blood am I sick,
If I wash my hands in others blood an I sick,
If I drench myself in others bloood am I sick,
If I bathe myself in others blood

Read more...Collapse )

Thursday, January 2nd, 2003

(a sucker is born every minute)

Subject:DONT FORGET' IM THE SHIT!
Time:9:56 pm.
Mood: enthralled.
I just got a great suprise. My lori purchased me a paid account so I can be one of the cool kids now. She is such a swetheart and i love her so much. All and all its been a good day today. No dogs tried to bite me, I got beer in the fridge, and a girl who loves me. I should be greatful my life is so good. I really have nothing to complain about. Besides the fact I dont have a car or make a lot of money or have my own place. Ill shut up now.

Friday, December 27th, 2002

(1 born to suck | a sucker is born every minute)

Subject:ANYBODY WANNA' WASTE SOME TIME
Time:8:18 pm.
Mood: ecstatic.
A lot has been going on latley. I think its been like a month scnce' I last posted. I dont know why I guess i'm just a pretty introverted guy. I dont exactaly like sharing my personal life with anyone but lori. i've been really busy at working a lot of hours and trying to divide the rest of my time between my love and my friends so livejornal takes a back seat to that as well. I also feel I'm a pretty dull guy unless you get to know me. my wit dosent transfer well into type.

I did have a fairly nice christmas i got a lot of cds a dvd player and a bunch of other cool crap. now I just need to build a dvd collection. What I'm really looking for is a movie called "boondock saints" i cant find the damn thing anywherei guess i should just look harder. Thats my lazynes coming into play.

I had a bitch of a day at work today 50 dogs and only 1 jeebus to look after them all. It sucked. They really need to pay me more than they do. GOD DAMN THE MAN always trying to keep me down.

My precious lori got her licens today. Im so proud of her. She inspires me to get my shit together and do somthing with myself. I miss that girl so much when Im not around her. All I can think about is the next time I can se her and feel her in my arms. I swear I can smell her, taste her and feel her whenever i think of her.

so distracted, damn Requiem for a dream is such a sick movie. I watched like 4 times in 2 days.

Wednesday, November 27th, 2002

(6 born to suck | a sucker is born every minute)

Subject:PRYING OPEN MY THIRD EYE
Time:10:41 pm.
Mood: hungry.
Just thought i'd share a little somthing with ya' all. This is my third eye. It holds a lot of personal meaning for me but I wont get into that unless someone is intrested so enjoy. Damn I need a tan and a haircut!



Thursday, November 21st, 2002

(3 born to suck | a sucker is born every minute)

Subject:THE DEEPER THE WOUND THE MORE I'M INSIDE YOU
Time:10:05 pm.
Mood:its not good, but its not bad..
I saw Hairy Potter on monday with Lori. I got off work and went straight to her house, which is what I always do on monday evening. It was pretty good but the first one was better. In all truth i'm more of a Lord of The Rings kind of guy. After that we went and ate at The Cheesecake Factory. It was pretty good but they didnt have the appitizer I orderd and they had a crap-ass beer tap beer selection. Somthing like sam adams, miller, and miller lite. I thought a classy joint like that would have a better selection but I guess I thought wrong.

Viggy,Viggy,Viggy, you,ve been a bad monkey.

Sorry, distracted by Ghostbusters 2.


So the next day we went out to dinner and she forgot to help her mom move some stuff in a storage unit of theirs that got flooded and mildewed. No big deal right... wrong the next day her mom lit into her. I could see how much it hurt her and the tears in her eyes but i felt like I couldnt do a thing about it. I felt I would be out of line to step in between her and her mother. I just wanted to say "enough, Cant you see how bad she feels, its a damn accident, she forgot' dont be so hard on her" but it was a family matter so I felt like I shouldnt get involved. Instead i just helped move all the stuff just to get it out of the way so it would be dropped and i could enjoy the rest of my time with her.

Oh, yeah i'm also one of the cool kids now. I've got my very own animated icon. I think it was just too damn funny not to have. Thank you Lori.

Saturday, November 16th, 2002

(a sucker is born every minute)

Subject:It feels so strange, so....forigen
Time:1:37 pm.
Mood: lethargic.
So lazy today. I dont have to do shit. This it the first day in over three months that i get to myself. I still have a lot of stuff to do but that dosent mean its going to get done. I so badly need to clean my room. There is approxiantlly two square feet of floor space left and the carpet has been replaced by a layer of dirty laundry but I dont care. Im such a damn slob sometimes. I need to mow both the lawns as well but we live in a corner house with a big back yard so its going to take like four hours and I dont think that there is that much sun left in the day.

My friends want to go out today as well but I know exactilly how that will wind up. I will go out, drink way too much beer, smoke way too much chronic, drink a lot more beer smoke even more pot and pass out at two or three and I have to go to work tommrow at 7:00 so that may not happen.

Friday, November 15th, 2002

(5 born to suck | a sucker is born every minute)

Subject:DEATH IS A SIXTY POUND CHOW NAMED COWBOY
Time:9:57 pm.
Mood:dazed.
Im still kind of jittery from work today. I was getting a dog out of a run at work when it almost mauled me. This dog has a history with me. It has tried to snap at me a few tims before but only as warnings, but today was different i guess. I opened the gate to the run to slip a lead around the dogs neck when it lunged at my face. I jumped back just in time and it only caught my shirt but it knocked me on my ass and continued to shread my shirt to tiny bits. I dont know how but I managed to grab the scruff at the back of its neck with one hand and start punching it in the jaw with the other hand before I hit the ground. So Im laying on the ground with a vicious dog on top of me trying to kill me. After about a minute of staring down the cavernous barrel of this truly awesome predator one of the girls from inside saw me and screamed for the doctor. it took him about half a minute to get there and just as he did i threw the dog off me and he kicked it into the next run and slammed the gate shut. i stod up and thought i was tore to pieces because my shirt was shreaded and coverd in blood but is wasent my blood it was the dogs. I didnt have a scratch on me. when everyone saw me they were supprised that I was not hurt and i just said somthing like "yeah, I know how to keep my bitches in check". Then I picked up my name badge which was chewed to pieces and it broke off right at the istant in assistant so it now reads Kenne Ass and I said "oh, im an ass now too". After all that I just walked off and took a good long break. besides almost being chewed to death the day went pretty well.

Sunday, November 10th, 2002

(1 born to suck | a sucker is born every minute)

Subject:LOUSY TECHNOLOGY.
Time:7:39 pm.
Mood: aggravated.
So I finally got motivated to try to post a picture in my journal and my stupid computer wouldn't upload it on ranchoweb, but i shouldn't complain. Its probably not the computer, its the operator. About 99% of the time i have no clue what i'm doing, but I just keep plugging away in vain making new and more confusing mistakes every day. It dose get powerful entertaining sometimes. After all the frustration passes i get to partake in one of my favorite past-times. Laughing at stupid people and when that moron is myself it just compounds the humor.

(1 born to suck | a sucker is born every minute)

Subject:blah, blah, blah.
Time:6:00 pm.
Mood: contemplative.
I've been reading "the long road out of hell" and i found a quote i really like, so I figuer i should share.


"people dont keep journals for themselvs. They keep them for other people, like a secret they dont want to tell but they want everyone to know. The only safe place for your thoughts is your memory, which people can't take and read when you're not looking---at least not yet. I'm starting to think that if the Internet is the CB raido or the nineties, then the home computer is the trailer park of the soul, a dangerous tool in the hands of idiots. Eventually self-imposed fascism will destroy man as he convinces himself he doesn't have to think anymore."

Thursday, November 7th, 2002

(1 born to suck | a sucker is born every minute)

Subject:ITS ALIVE! ALIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Time:11:24 pm.
Mood: mellow.
I finlay got my piece of crap running, but im happy to have a piece of crap so i shouldnt complain. There is a lot of stuff i havent written about but its to much to describe in detail so ill just sum it up. Past month, 3 concerts, 8 bands, 2 partys, lots of stupid people, lots more fun, forgotten names, remembered faces, lots of work, a little drama, but a good month all and all.

Tuesday, November 5th, 2002

(a sucker is born every minute)

Subject:JEEBUS ITS BEEN TOO LONG!!!!
Time:9:28 pm.
Mood: grumpy.
Too long, hehehe. I suck. I never upadate any more. but I guess thats because I dont have a working computer. well, it works but not well. i only connect at something mind-numbingly slow like 9600 or some other speed that was cool when war games was still in theaters. well im on someone else's computer and i dont like this key board. the space key keeps sticking and the keys are all worn down so i'm gonna go. guess i'll post in another month or so. smell ya later!?

Friday, September 27th, 2002

(5 born to suck | a sucker is born every minute)

Subject:SHIT!!!!!!!!
Time:11:25 pm.
Mood:pissed&irate&loved.
Every time i try to update my stupid computer boots me off line. I hate macs. I had a nice long entry written an oops! my computer restarts, I guess there is a reason my brother named this desktop "Anger". So now i need somthing good and angry, like pantera and good ol' jamesons irish whiskey. It will settle me down a bit.

So as I was saying in the previous post that was deleted I got a promotion at work. In a month ill be a supervisor, More pay, less hours and i make the schedule. What else could I want.

In other news im going to see MSI on oct 29th its gonna kick ass. loris friend jenn was kind enough to buy me a ticket and ive never even met her. She is my second favorite person in the world right now.

speaking of favorite people Brian is at the bottom of my list rigt now.he pissed lori off today and that made me sooooo angry. I want to smash all his teeth out with a hammer. I cant comprehend how someone can make their own family feel that bad. I should sit down and have a talk with him about being a man. Most of the shit he dose is so childish. I have one quote for him.

You cant be somthing youre not
be your self
by yourself
stay away from me

I dont even know him all that well and i think he is so stupid. Maybe not stupid but lacking wisdom. it seems like he needs to be better than everyone else. He also seems like a coward. He never pulls this shit when im around only a few little comments here and there but i guess thats because im much bigger than him. The thing that bugs me the most is he made lori cry, no one should be that disrespectful to family, It makes me boil inside.

FUCKIN' A

Friday, September 13th, 2002

(1 born to suck | a sucker is born every minute)

Subject:ALL WORK AND NO PLAY MAKES JIM A DULL BOY
Time:1:01 am.
Mood: working.
I want a day off soon. I hate this monday - tuesday weekend bull shit. I want a a real weekend off but I think this going to be my usual scedule unless I speak up and this even will probably do nothing. I need to get a car and become one of those uppity-mobile types. Im looking for anyting dirt chaep. I really dont care what it is. I just need somthing in a hurry. W alking suckcs. It sounds like that excersize thing and we all know how much i hate that. I miss Lori too it would give me sooooo much more time with her. I really need to get my ass in gear.

Wednesday, September 11th, 2002

(2 born to suck | a sucker is born every minute)

Subject:SHOTS OF JACK AND SWIGS OF BEER
Time:8:40 pm.
Mood: drunk.
Jeebus, im sooo freekin bored. Nobodys home, nobody is on line, so I felt it was a good idea to get sloppy drunk. What the hell i say. I dont need to be into work till noon tommrow so im sitting around watchin t.v. and it really sucks. Its the same regurgitated crap ive been seein for the past year. I sort of feel bad for saying that and trivalizing a day like this, but for lack of a better way to put it i really dont care. Sure it was a huge event in history but its been blown way out of porpotion. Its been turned into a maketing tool to sell T-shirts and little flags that end up discarded on the side of the freeway. I do feel sorry for all the people who died and all the heroisim and all but it shouldnt be rembered like this. So off the topic ive been home form work for an hour and a half and im drunk as a skunk, Its been 15min science i started writing and my precious love has come on-line so I gotta go.

(8 born to suck | a sucker is born every minute)

Subject:I'VE BEEN TOO DAMN LAZY
Time:12:55 pm.
Mood: content.
So this is my first post in about three weeks. I just kind of gave up for a while. My computer kind of sucks and shuts doun every time I try to post, lousy iMac. I guess I really shouldent complain, i am using it for free thanks to my brother but it is using 1/2 the minnium amount of ram, so i guess it confuses easily. Its using somthing like 64 megabites as opposed to the 128 minnimum. Pretty funny, huh. So in other news ive benn really busy between Lori and my new job. I like my new job and all but the hours are all fucked up and i get shitty days off, but its fun and the pay is good so I shouldent complain. So I went to Lori's house this "weekend", being monday and tuesday for me and I had alot of fun. I miss her so much even though I get to see her like 3 or sometimes 4 days a week. She is my additcion, but in a good way. I think I also havent been because it seems like no one reads this but a handful of people and i can talk to most of the people who care in person or on I.M. so I sort of feel that by posting in here would just be repeating myself, but I guess to get more people to read this I need to post more often and write about more intersting stuff. So, to change subjects again and keep things nice and non-sequitor I bought some new jeans and a shirt the othe day and for those of you who dont know thats a big deal for me. I not exactally what you would call "high fasion" so buying a new outfit is a rarity for me. Im prous of myself seeing how ive been wearing the same stuff for the past few years. Also on tuesday I went to collage with Lori, even though i dont attend it I just go to keep her companyand I guess to make my presence known. I guess that could be taken as jelosuly but its not. I just dont like people bothering her and causing her to be uncomfortable. Lori is the greatest thing that has ever happened to me. She is the first person who cares about me as much as I care about her. She make me feel the best Ive ever felt. I really love her. By the way the amazing Lori has made me a new user pic. Thanks beautiful.

Friday, August 16th, 2002

(3 born to suck | a sucker is born every minute)

Subject:I SMELL
Time:7:48 pm.
Mood: exhausted.
I had my firsy day of real work today. It's a;ot cooler than i thought it would be. I get paid to play with dogs all day. There is some other stuff I have to do as well, like feed them, medicate them, and pick up poo. I also have to "restrain" them when they get shots and stuff. I get the bad job of taking fecals as well. That basiclly consists of me putting a stick with what resembles the eye of a sewing needle on it up there butt and pulling out a small pice of poo. A whole lot of not fun if you ask me, unless thats your thing.


So im going with Lori to see Rocky Horror Picture Show. Im excited, I get to bust out all my old chains and bondage and stuff. I miss being cool. I want my blue hair back, or mabey purple......yeah purple. I never should have cut my hair off.


I miss lori so much. I need a car so I can see her more often. It sucks to be seperated from the one you love, but it has been said that distance makes the heat grow fonder. That just means that i must make the precious moments we we have togher more meaningful.

LiveJournal for jeebus.

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